Because Andy Said So

Me: Hey, Acts! How are you feeling. Act III: Tired. Act II: Bloated. Act I: Incomplete. Me: Okay. Those are all reasonable.  Me: III, you'll have some time to rest before we get around to even plotting your revisions.   Me: II, I already have a list of things to trim from you.   Me: And Act I, I have SO many notes about you. A lot of things to flesh out, but also some stuff to cut. I think you'll feel better after the makeover. Act I: Should I be nervous? Me: No, you should be excited! Act I: And my chapters? Me: Uh... Welllllll... They're in for a lot of change. There's going to be merging and cutting and new scenes. And you're getting two chapters from Act II that I realized should have been considered Act I from the get-go. Act II: Um. What? Me: Yeah, so remember you felt bloated? I actually agree with that assessment. There's a lot of trimming in store for you and very little expansion. Although I also mismarked your ending and you get the start ...

Me: Ending... Oh... I like you so very much. I may even love you. Ending: Oh, good. I was hoping you would. I was designed to be happy in the hopes that would make other people happy. Me: Mission accomplished. Now you'll have to excuse me while I collapse. I wrote close to 9,000 words today and my brain is mush.

Me: So, 28 and 29, you both concluded today. And you both totally rocked! 28: And which of us did you like better? Me: Um... I feel that's a unfair question. 28: Is it though? 29: I mean, maybe? Cause, like, 28, there was a lot of jealousy boiling up in us, but at the end of it all, we are part of a POLYAMOROUS romance. Like, one of our core messages is about how you don't need to pick ONE love to be all obsessive about. 28: Yeah, sure. Polyamory is great. I just want to know which one of us she loves more. Me: That's not really how all of this works, 28. 28: Okay. But I end on a more compelling cliff hanger. 29: And I contain a freaking -spoiler redacted-! What's more awesome than a -spoiler redacted-? Besides, no one actually LIKES cliffhangers. Me: Look, I just wanted to say you BOTH did great and I'm proud of you. Now scurry along. I have a dishwasher to empty. Me (closing door): Good grief. At least there's only two more chapters to go.

24: I am the new Chapter 24! I can't believe she wanted all this to happen in Chapter 28. Glad she popped back to add me! 24: 2/3rds of you weren't supposed to exist at all. 24: OMG. Change your name! You're 25 now. And you had unscheduled stuff too. (24 is now 25.) 25: Fine. 26: Hey, 25! I just talked to the writer. She says we have a lot of scenes that kinda establish the same things and so we need to decide what to cut and see if we can't merge into one chapter. 25: Of course she does. What does the writer have against me? 27: I don't think she has anything against you, 25. 25: You would take her side. I heard her gushing about your content. Wait until she decides those arcs need to go a completely different way and she's chopping you to bits. 23: Why do you have to be so negative, 25? It's not that she doesn't like your content. She's just worried about her word count being high. 25: Whatever, syncopant. 28: Could you all PLEASE stop ...

Me: Chapter 23... First, wow. You don't believe in pulling punches, do you? 23: Could have been worse. There were definitely more hurtful ways that scene at the bar could have gone. Me: True. Thank you for your restraint. While drama is fun and all, I appreciate you not allowing the characters to forget they have hearts and brains, not just a talent for theatrics. 23: So you're happy with me? Me: For the most part, yes. But, have you seen your numbers? 23: You're referencing my word count? Me: Yeah. So, you're over 6k.Which makes you our longest chapter by about a thousand words. 23: Are you going to split me in two? Or cut some of me? Because of both of those seem like they'd hurt. Me: Not to be glib, but if creating a novel doesn't hurt at least a little, you're probably doing it wrong. 23: I wish I'd been born a short story.

Chapter 22: I'm awesome, aren't I? I mean, that was basicially perfect drama right there. Although it would have been better if you'd let me keep that stuff you cut and rewrote in the second scene. Me: You are aware that you're in the last act, yes? Because the stuff you're referring to, which you were trying to add even though it wasn't outlined, would mean there's no way the story would be wrapped up in the six chapters following you. 22: That sounds more like a problem with Chapters 23-28 than with me. Me: Not really, no. 22: I don't know what you're complaining about. You deleted the seven hundred words you thought were causing an issue and added seven hundred other words to replace them. Me: That is true. 22: Also, weren't you just telling The Outline that the stuff you were putting in 23 was getting the axe? So that frees up an entire chapter. And my detour would have only taken two chapters, tops. So it really wouldn't have...

Me: Hey, Chapter 21! What's wrong? 21: I feel like a failure because I wasn't mean enough. 19 says I need to start myself all over. Me: Chapter 19 is sadistic. You nurtured a lot of doubts and fears. That's better than just making everyone miserable. It means the characters haven't given up like they might have if you didn't also give them hope, but they are seeing not achieving their happy ending as a serious possibility. 21: You think so? Me: Absolutely. You did everything the outline asked you to and ended the act with a solid lead-in to the next one. Act II: Hold on! Sorry to interupt, but did you just say I'm done? Me: For now. I already have revision notes. But we're moving on to Act III now. Act II: Oh. Yeah, I guess I did finish everything on the boards for me. Huh. What do I do now? Me: I don't know. Go sit in the hot tub or something. That's what I'm about to do.

Act II: Um... Andy? It's been a while without feedback again. Me: Oh, Yeah. Been kind of a weird... however long it's been. Bring in Chapters 16-20 and we can chat. 16: We already talked. You called me mean. Me: Riiiiiight... You can go, then. 17, any concerns? 17: Not really. Me: Alright. Well, I loved the way the scene with Yuri's prickly boss went. I liked her. And good job showing how awful Vil's Grandmother is. Her, I hate. Chapter 18? 18: I'm guess you're going to say that I was mean to Vil. Me: I probably would have if I hadn't seen 19 yet. 19 is down right cruel to poor guy. 19: I agree with 16 about you trying to coddle characters. Me: I thought you might. 20: Yeah, they're all kind of mad at me. They were complaining I was downright nice, and saying that like it's a bad thing to be. Me: I think you were a really good level of nice. The whole book can't be bad things all time. 20: That's what I told them! Me: If nothing e...