Because Andy Said So

(Image is the personification of my novel. It has a Bitmoji avatar now. Why wouldn't it?) Me: Hey, Chapter 3! I notice you didn't follow the outline after the first section. The next two scenes are completely different from what we'd agreed on. Chapter 3: What you dictated, you mean. But your ideas sucked. What I actually contain is way better. Me: I don't appreciate your attitude. Chapter 3: But am I wrong? Me: (sulking) No... #writing

Me: So, Chapter 2, I see you adhered to the first 2/3rds of the outline, then decided the rest could be cut. Chapter 2: Yep. Me: But the last section was where something actually happens. The first two bits are both summarized as people thinking about stuff. Chapter 2: And waiting! And also traveling. Traveling is definitely action, if that's what you're getting at. Me: I guess... But are you sure you're engaging enough? Chapter 2: I DO end in screaming. Me: I'm not sure that will save you in the rewrites.

Me: 4011 words! Way to go! Chapter 1: So you're happy with me? Me: Yes! Very! Even though about 1k of your words were taken from a previous draft. Ch1: Oh, good! ...Wait... Previous draft? Am I not your first Chapter 1? Me: F, no. You're not even the first Chapter 1 of this particular book. Ch1: Oh. Um... I'm not really sure how I feel about that, to be honest. Me: I'm sure you'll be my LAST Chapter 1. Ch1: I can live with that. I smile awkwardly and hope Chapter 1 doesn't know I'm lying.