In Praise of the NEW Chapter One

Me: Hey, New Chapter One! Do you have a minute.

New Chapter One: I guess... (approaches with trepidation)

Me: So let's discuss the new opening passages! What do you think about them?

New Chapter One: I mean, I like them?

Me: They made me cry! 

New Chapter One: Oh. I'm sor-

Me: No, don't apologize. That's a good thing. I think you're going to do a MUCH better job of connecting with readers than your predecessors!

New Chapter One: What? Really?

Me: Yes, really! I just wanted to tell you that you're doing a great job! Now get out there and kick some more ass!